Main Attraction

"I am the principle character in a world of my own."

I know that sounds not only a bit trite and cliche, but also ego centric. Yet, that idea is something we all share. We are all the main character in our own autobiography, and as since mine is still in it's rough draft, there are still revisions to make and chapters to add. Yet, as I read through the earlier chapters, I am often pained by the thought that I want to revise these earlier sections so that I can bring new things into the current chapter I am writing.

I am always looking for something and seldom finding it. I go to bookstores and buy books I never read. I go to the game store to buy video games I never play. For my business I buy equipment I think I need but seldom use, and I wonder how much of the things I buy from the gocery should have sat on the shelves rather than be consumed absent mindedly as I toil away on the next of my many projects.

I do read magazines. I read them by the gross. I think they are replacing comic books of my youth. The difference is all of them are trying to either show me stuff that other people can do or teach me how to do what other people can do. I read the articles, look at the how-to's and even take some notes, but they seldom make their way into my collective.

So today, on my birthday I ponder what Hugh Heffner said on the radio during my drive. As he spoke to Terry Gross on NPR, he said that at 81 years old, he might be ridiculus, but he lives a life that many envy and few achieve, but further, he said that he was living in a world of his own making. He wears silk pajamas everyday, becuase he can. He lives with three girlfrieds, because he can. Listening to him speak gives you the aura of someone who has not only lived a life seldom seen, but understands that the world of him that we see, is the characture of the life necessary to sell more magazines. Still editor and chief at 81 he still believes that he is showing off the girl next door with class and an air of innocence.

I laughed a little, mostly because it has been a long time since I was sneeking a peak at a playboy hoping my parents wouldn't find out and since the magazines I read today are all technical I thought about his statement, in fact, I turned it into a bumper sticker in my mind. Instead of reading this on the car in front of me, I am slapping this bumper sticker on my car and driving ahead. This is my world. I am the main character. When people read this story this will be the part when the story turns, and you begin to run through the pages with rapid anticipation. In the movie of my life, this will be when the Rocky soundtrack starts playing and the crowed grips the armrest a little tighter.

I sure hope the credits don't roll after that last sentence.