Yo-yo

I'm definitely a yo-yo. As an adult I put on a little weight with each of my babies. Even though I wasn't pregnant, I ate when my wife ate and gained when wife gained. I generally took most of it off, but never as good as my wife and slowly on the approach to our third pregnancy, I blossomed out to my biggest weight to that point in life. We then moved to Florida, and once here i needed to buy new clothes to fit in for work.

Being a yo-yo like me means keeping a closet full of clothes of various sizes. After our third kid, i was looking at how large i had gotten and dieted over the span of a year get down to fit into the smallest clothes in my closet. But a bad bout of bronchitis and a month worth of steroids and i had put back half of what i lost. 9 months of diet and 4 of it gone in 30 days.

I began to realize that there really was no thin or fat. I was simply a fat person all of my life with small moments of thin punctuated throughout.

I have lost 29 pounds since August yet i don't have any confidence that this will be anything more than a comma in the sentence of being big.

I would be remiss if I didn't at least mention how amazing it feels to put on some of my skinny clothes. It's like those commercials where the super skinny chick puts on those super skinny jeans and they end up being a little loose. That may be what i feel like, but that isn't how it works. I put them on when I am too big, and watch them slowly start to fit. Then I begin to negotiate with myself about when they look ok to be seen outside of the bedroom.

Again, that distorted view.

Enough for now!